Our Complicated Relationship with Church Work

Originally published here - Vibrant Faith Articles.

Last month I had lunch with a ministry leader—I get to see her in-person only a couple of times a year, so it was so good catching up. We lost track of time; for almost four hours we talked about life, ministry, faith, and everything in-between. We were well into the conversation when she said something that struck me deeply, something we don’t talk about often but probably should. We know we’re called into ministry, she said, “but I wasn’t ready for this work (in the church) to hurt so much, to have such a negative effect on my faith some days.” This kicked off a long thread in our conversation. All too often, when someone asks me what it’s like to work in the church, my answer is: “It’s complicated.” I sound like a teenager describing her relationship status on social media.

My ministry friend shared her own struggle to be authentic in a church world that often judges leaders for not living up to expectations. For example, if we extend our love and care for someone who doesn’t always “play by the Christian rules,” we are guilty by association. If they don’t believe, then maybe we don’t really believe. And if we have adult children who are not actively practicing their faith, what does that say about us? It’s exhausting to worry about what others think, and yet that’s human nature...

​How Our Humanness Infects Our Mission
At our best, as ministry leaders, we serve others as we serve the mission of Jesus. But because we are human, not divine, it’s complicated. We might have colleague issues. We might turn our workplace, or our community, into an “us” vs. “them” battle. We might fight too much for the opportunity to be “right,” or push our own agenda. We all have our weaknesses.

​And sometimes we respond with complacency or indifference to new ideas or new energy—we hang onto “But we’ve always done it this way.” Even if we haven’t responded this way, we’ve seen others who have, and it breaks our heart. Unless we’re lucky (or wearing blinders) we’ve seen a leader abusing their power. No matter the ministry, the denomination, or even the geographic situation, this work isn’t always a “taste of heaven.”

So, how do we nurture hope and perseverance? Or better yet, as church leaders, how do we continue to grow our faith, and grow a more intimate relationship with Jesus, when we witness what church looks like “behind the scenes”?

​Read more of this article HERE at Vibrant Faith.
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